Tonight I think of you,
and my heart aches. It aches for your presence.
These hands of mine seem so insignificant alone,
and my fingers ache to be intertwined with yours.
My chest begins to sting,
and I remember the kisses you left on my heart;
you promised to make it all better.
And it was better.
I shut my eyes as hard as I can (it hurts
but I can't stand the sight of anything.
Anything less beautiful than you, darling)
and I remember the glimmer in your eyes
the way they lit up when you smiled.
I curl up and swathe myself with the bed covers
(but this cold body of mine won't stop shivering.
and I remember your embrace,
the warmth that melted my bitter and frigid body,
the whispers that decelerated my heavy breaths,
the closeness that left no room for anxiety.
I bite my lower lip in aggravation - it bleeds,
but i'm too irked too care. So I swallow the blood
hoping the sharp aftertaste would interrupt this next thought
and still, i remember your kisses,
how your tongue brought color back to my dead pale lips,
the exuberance from your lips shooting fire through my veins,
and the sweet breaths you stain my lips with after.
The night leaves me in desparatation
dealing with your absence leaves me unsettled
i lift myself up, leaving the tears i drowned myself in behind;
and i catch a faint glimpse of light peeking in from my window.
The first thing i seem to notice is the sound
the sound of stray dogs barking to find their way
and it reminded me of nothing but the discomfort
the throbbing soreness of missing you, love
the sound of birds' wings flapping, and their chirping
and the thought of you recurs to my mind instantly
how you complained the sound wouldn't let you fall to your blissful sleep
how i wretchedly desired to silence all that bothered you
and watch your eyelids drape over your beautiful eyes.
I looked up to the sky, it had that baby blue color
night fades quickly, the moon was slowly beginning to dwindle
the pureness of the sky,
like the pureness of the heart i beheld in you
oh how i missed you.
For a moment,
the beauty makes everything seem meaningful
and i find myself torn between suffering and the beauty of it
but that golden yellow starts to reflect all around me
as the morning summer sun starts to unveil
and i tell myself that this is all for you.
Warm summer wind passes by me,
as i feel so still and unmoving
as i drown into the serenity of what seems to be nothingness.
nothing. just my gloomy self, and the thoughts of my lover.
I decide to take a deep breath, and cleanse myself of this torment
I let the image of you repeat itself over and over
as I let all those captured seconds overwhelm my mind
i sit there undisturbed, thinking of all that you are.
you've got a soul that could shine so bright,
a soul that radiates enough to blind the almost-seven-billion humans alive
and with that, the world doesn't stand a chance.
you've got a smile that's luminosity could astound them all,
and evoke purity into their souls,
and mend all of their broken hearts.
you've got a heart that could make them weak,
amazing how it's constantly replenished with generosity,
and how it defines beauty in its own unparalleled way.
they only hid you because you were right
and you've got that soul they can never hold back, a sterling unmatched and untamed soul
you are strong, and you will make it through.
glow, my darling, it's what you do best
oh that arresting beauty, so unmistakably bright
even the northern star would be jealous.
for all it's worth, i will always see you as the brightest star
but please don't let that light die in vain,
don't let them take your light, don't let them break you down.
words are an underestimation of all that you are
and dare i sell you short
so i'll close my eyes, and remember all that you've given me
a love so genuine.
we are but two caged birds
yearning to see the light of day together
and we may not have wings but this i promise, my dear,
someday, we will fly.
our hands entwined, our bodies interlaced
someday, we'd lie together in harmony underneath the stars
but i'll marvel at you instead
at your breathtaking and undying light.
the day has passed, night falls again
but this time, i will embrace it with open arms
for the hope of "someday".